May 12, 2009 marked the 5 th month since we last held our Greyson. 5 months later and my heart is just as broken and still missing a huge part of the whole.
5 Months.
I used to sweat the 2 days that I had to be away from Grey when I worked the weekends. I haven't held him in 5 months.
5 Months ago, a huge part of me died in my arms.
After 5 Months, a few things have changed. Seeing a infant the same age as Grey when he died doesn't bring instant tears anymore, though seeing a baby the age that Grey would be makes my chest go numb.
I don't wake as often at night swearing that I heard Grey crying in his bed.
Most of all, I know that Luke, Seth and Riley are going to be okay. Youth heals all wounds, or makes them bearable.
I have struggled with explaining to close friends and family that my pain gets no better. The only reason that I hurt less is that I have started the numbness of shock, and disbelief. Some have asked me if I think that I will ever be back to my old self. I can say with all certainty that I will never be who I was before Grey' death.
I Love You Grey, Grey!
We all miss you so much.
Ah DA!
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